His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Randomize
