I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
