we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
