I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
