if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize