Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
