Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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