mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
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