so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
