I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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