I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
