idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
...so i touched it.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
