wakey wakey hands off snakey
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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