Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
