Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
