I want to stick my p in your. b.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
That's when you crack a 10am beer
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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