sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
