brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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