I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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