I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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