he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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