Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
