The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
