I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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