i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
