called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
