I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
