i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
