dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
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