I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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