I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
