try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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