Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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