Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
do herpes really smell.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
How external is "for external use only"?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
