Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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