I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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