...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
