we have officially lost it.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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