I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
