Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
