Don't worry. I has chaperone.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
