My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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