And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
