it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
