If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Randomize
