Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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