Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize
