I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
only if we run a train.
done.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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