The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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