I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
this is an emotional support booty call
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
